Rushton v Phelps

An email from Elliot Rushton to his parents and siblings.

On Thursday John and I went up to the University of Michigan. John talked to the Women's coach and observed their dryland to compare to ours (they were designed by the same guy). I was to gain the worldly experience of swimming with the Men's team.

The varsity team was doing relay starts mid-way through practice, so they said it would be better for me to swim with the Club Wolverine guys. We introduced ourselves to Jon Urbanchek who just hangs out and keeps the CW guys occupied so that Bowman can deal with the varsity team. Urbanchek was incredibly friendly, but still had this devilish look about him that made you think he was a pint-sized Satan.

The CW guys there that day were Andrew Hurd (Canadian record holder in the 400 Free, who I knew already), Klete Keller, Michael Phelps and Ben Michaelson (NCAA Division 2 record holder in the 100 Free and 100 Fly). I didn't recognize who Ben was until a bit later, so when Urbanchek introduced me to the group by saying "Guys, this is Elliot.... Elliot, that's Micheal and that's Klete, we call him Cleteus." it didn't really help. Because, I mean, who the hell doesn't know who those two guys are?

So off we go. Warm up was an 800 done as 50 free, 50 stroke. Lane one is Keller, lane two is Hurd, lane three myself, lane four Phelps, and lane five Michaelson.

My logic on this set was as follows: I don't want to look like a chump, and I'm next to the world record holder in the IMs. So I should obviously do backstroke on the stroke 50’s and pretty quickly so that they don't have to wait for me. However after 200 yards or so my logic quickly turned to: “Holy crap how do they move so slowly? I'd better do the slowest, ugliest breaststroke I can so as not to win warm-up.” A little later it also evolved to include sitting on the bottom of the pool every 50 and waiting them out.

Alas, despite my best efforts I won warm-up. Urbanchek runs over to me and says "You beat them!" still not sure of what was going on I replied "Uhhh, yeah. Maybe I miscounted?"

• Next: 16 x 50 Kick: 4 on :50, 4 on :45.

We're just kicking along. I'm listening to them joke back and fourth about nothing, insulting each other, etc.. Phelps likes to stop constantly and smack his board down on the water to make a smacking sound. Keller tries to do it when we're at the wall but can't get the angle right and has very little sound. Urbanchek taunts him "Cleteus, that sounds pretty feminine, keep up the good work." After a few 50s Urbanchek gets bored and realizes that I've been beating Phelps.
"Michael, what the [expletive deleted]? He's Div. 3!! You're letting a Div 3 swimmer beat you? You pussy!!" We do some more 50's.

I'd lost count. Not sure if we were on number 12 or 13, I kind of had to watch and see when everyone else left while also watching the clock.
Phelps leaves, so apparently we just did one on :45. After I push off I realize he's still at the wall laughing, taunting me "I got you!!" Obviously feeling a bit stupid, but realizing my way out I look at him and say "Did you?" This ruins the whole set now. Apparently I was the only one paying attention to the interval. Now all five of us are floating around on our kickboards trying to figure out how many we have left and when we should leave.

• 400 IM: 50 drill, 50 swim.

Phelps yells "On the bottom!!" but everyone but me leaves at random. Not me though, oh no. I had a plan. I was going to email you all and tell you I had beaten Michael Phelps at a head to head 400 IM in practice. Sure, he would be going easy and half of it was drill, but I could still say "I beat Michael Phelps at a 400 IM head-to-head," without lying.

I still had to act casual though. I couldn't make it apparent I was being a jerk. I did the fastest smoothest single arm fly I could, and the lamest backstroke drill, with my arm barely pausing at the top of the stroke. I had a huge lead at the half.
However, no matter how easy Phelps goes and how un-easy I go on breaststroke we're still a little unbalanced. Going into the freestyle we were dead even. For the whole first 300 I was laughing my ass off while swimming. Thinking how funny I could make this email sound and how I could boast about it for the rest of my life. Barely dragging the nail of my middle finger on finger-tip drag freestyle I noticed something un-ordinary:
Phelps was trying. Oh shit. He was kicking and had picked his stroke rate up. I was boned. I picked it up a little, still trying to NOT look like I was trying to usurp the world record holder. Blatantly obvious by this point was the fact that Phelps knew what I was up to; apparently he takes pride in the 400 IM. He finishes with me a stroke behind, I'm laughing uncontrollably now, I just got beaten at being a jerk by the world record holder. As soon as I finish Phelps yells in my face "I WIN!!".

• 2 x (400 Pull "casual", 4 x 100 Pull on 1:05 "strong")

Urbanchek finds me a pull-buoy and Phelps lends me his smaller paddles (Reds, he uses the Blues). I notice that he uses the wrist straps on them and consider teasing him about it: "Wrist straps 'eh? I thought those were for little girls?" I decide against it as I didn't want to anger him and motivate him to set a world record in some event I swim just to piss me off - which I wouldn't put past him.

Distance and stroke swimmers break apart. Distance is Keller, Hurd and myself. Phelps, Michealson and Chuck Sayao, who came in late, do the stroke set.

• 2 x (4 x 200 Pink @ 2:20, 3 x 200 Red @ 2:15, 2 x 200 Orange @ 2:10, 200
EZ @ 3:00)

Michigan uses a similar colour system to Kenyon, but that set above is written in Kenyon colours for the sake of your understanding. Urbanchek decides upon my "targets" for each 200 (what we call 'zones' at Kenyon). Around 2:01, 1:59 and 1:54 for the three colours; Hurd and Keller are to be around 1:51's on the Orange 200s. (CR explanation for readers – these zones equate to aerobic overload, HR 150/155, anaerobic threshold, HR 160/165, lactate clearance, HR 170/185).

I wish I could tell you I held my own on this set, won my share of the 200's against Keller and Hurd. I didn't though. I did well, for me, hit my "target" every time, which was worth it just to hear Urbanchek say "Right on TARGET!" On the second round I figured I'd throw in whatever I had. My first 200 Orange on the second round was a 1:52 - "Below target! GREAT!!" Well, last one. I really threw in what I had left and busted out a 1:49. Good, for me, though from how far back I was it felt more like a 2:05. Keller won with a 1:42, and Hurd was just behind him with a 1:43. Urbanchek was thrilled because "America beat Canada!!!!" something he had been throwing around the whole set.

That was that. We warmed down and John and I drove back to Gambier.

I think it could have very well all been a dream.

-Elliot